Tonight I had one of those moments. Driving home, running errands, focused on the task at hand. When I see the ex-bf and his new gf walking along the Levee. If it were a David Lynch film my foot might have accidentally slipped and hit the gas instead of the brake. I might have taken satisfaction in the sound and feel of the 4WD tires crunching over their smug asses.
But it isn't that. So, I stare fixedly at the road in front of me pretending I didn't see them, that I don't see them walking companionably and smiling at one another. Pretending that I don't see that they are dressed for a night out. Don't see the sun illuminating her blond hair or how thin he looks.
The light changes. I hit the gas. And I pretend that the hole opening up in my chest has nothing to do with them and that the sudden wetness on my cheeks is from the song playing on the radio. It is simply my life.
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