Easter Rant

I was raised Catholic.  I was raised to believe in family first.

Thing is, it's been a long time since either of those felt more than just straw mutterings.

I haven't been a practicing Catholic since my spirituality was given over to my own hands.  I respect and honor this tradition.  It just wasn't for me - AT ALL.  That doesn't stop people from pushing and pulling at me trying to get me back in the corral of true believers.  Easter is a particularly push-y pull-y time.  Y'all should just give that shit up cuz it ain't happenin'.

Secondly - family.  I love my family.  Most of them.  But too much of any of them or too many of them all together and I just can't do it.  I have done it for years.  But I just don't want to anymore.  I don't want to pretend that I give a big rat's ass about most of them.  And I certainly don't want some big family hoedown from hell that I MUST attend or be ostracized.  FUCK IT!  That isn't 'family' to me.  That is manipulation pure and simple.  I would love to see and hang out with people one on one.  But the huge family dys-function is a thing of the past for me.

So this year I will not be observing Easter or family Easter.  I will be hanging out solo and taking care of me.  If I don't, who will?  This time of year in most spiritual beliefs is about rebirthing something into the world.  I want to attend that service.  And it's a private one.