Lace Patterns

She fingers my hair
tells me wistfully
"It's getting so long"
in the hopes I will let it continue.

Somehow that one sentence
makes me want to grab the shears
leave it in ragged clumps on the floor
ruffle what remains with my fingertips

But for the fact that
     I have done this before
     She has done this before

We have done this before
this old pattern

One laced with what I should be
what I should look like
how I should have long hair

The other, open rebellion
me choosing career
me eschewing makeup
and me leaving my hair to be what it is

I don't rush to that place of against
not this time
Instead I feel how she loves me
below the tired pattern
and simply reply "Thanks."