Job Hunting

Last week I was talking to a co-worker.  She was asking about potential jobs.  I told her of the few I had hopes to score an interview for, including an incoming investigator hired to head what will become a large multi-program group.

I was surprised when she came in yesterday and told me the new investigator wasn't going to be hiring since his group is small and she told me about an available job I already had a bead on.  When I asked her how her own job hunt was going, she got a weird look on her face.  I could tell she was excited and she told me she was going to be working with the new investigator I hoped would hire me.

I am genuinely happy for her.  She is in career building mode and this is the right opportunity for her.  Given a choice between hiring her and hiring me, I would probably choose her.  She is hard working, bright, easy to get along with, and works really long hours.  Oh and she's a PhD.  No contest.

The newer job opportunity would be with people I mostly know in a smaller lab working on a familiar subject.  It is a good match for me if it comes through.  I would be quite happy there.

So what's bugging me?

There's that weird sense of having been played.  Research has become dog-eat-dog corporate in its hiring as jobs evaporate daily and the pool of available talent gets deeper.  Money that used to be available for labs with multiple people have shrunk to almost nothing.  We are all competing for the same pie and his hiring a research associate undoubtedly means no money for a technician.  There's a weird sense of her having gotten the job before me which is silly.  In a straight up competition she gets it.  So maybe it's the behind the back maneuver that feels yucky.  Or the fact that I didn't really get a chance to strut my stuff.

Like I said, I am happy for her.  The other opportunity would be equally, if not better, than where I am now.  Just wanted to acknowledge the little bit of yuck and purge it.